He managed to stop himself from saying 'when everyone else stopped giving a fuck about me' because he now knew that not all of them had, at least not completely, though it had certainly seemed like it for a good long while.

"It still matters, it's just that..." His brow furrowed, thumping his bandaged thumb against his coffee cup, trying to think, he'd never had to justify this before, not even to himself, and he didn't have the right words to so now that he had to, "I don't fuckin' know." He finally concluded, shaking his head and reaching over, flicking his fingers, "Gimme."